purpose – Sarah Guldalian

For the Creatives

Someone told you that you were naive.
Somebody said you are too idealistic.
Someone told you that you’re too subjective.
Somebody said to use your head instead of your heart.
Someone told you that you are too right-brained.
Somebody told you to use logic.
Someone said you are too empathetic.
Somebody told you to quit being so nice.
Someone said you care too much.
Somebody told you that you are too passionate.

And so, you tried to figure it out — how to be “smarter,” less intuitive, more objective, realistic, more logical, to fit into the structure… And you took it too far.

You quit dreaming, quit listening with tenderness, quit connecting, hid your heart, led with facts, numbers and proof. In doing so, you lost your color, denied your gift of intuition, disregarded your creativity. You quit dreaming… and you lost yourself. Now you are just surviving.

I am here to encourage you to stop settling for survival.

Sometimes, in order to adult, we tell ourselves what we “should” think instead of admitting (even to ourselves) how we really feel. In order to survive, we morph our thoughts, our gifts, and our personalities to fit into a paradigm of who we (or others) think we should be. We begin to block our feelings to play the part — to stay in character. But when we quit allowing ourselves to feel, we lock up and hold on, instead of surrendering. We hide instead of healing. And in doing so, we begin to simply survive.

But survival is basic. Surviving is the lowest level of living. There is more than that — even so much more if we surrender, have faith, heal, and dare to dream.

You have to quit settling for survival. You have to quit allowing your thoughts and actions to be guided by societal paradigms. Until you surrender what you “should” be and truly adopt who God uniquely created you to be, you will barely hang on. But when you surrender what others think and begin to flow in the gifts God has given you, you will experience a new level of personal freedom, healthier relationships in your life, and even greater effectiveness on mission.

Start dreaming again. You aren’t naive. You aren’t stupid. You aren’t idealistic. You are creative, caring, and loving like your heavenly Father whose image you were created in. And the world needs more of Him through you. The world needs less yelling and more singing, less black and white and more color. You deserve that too.

Your talents are a gift – to you first – from God, and they are to be enjoyed. Enjoy them, and share them with the world. Go where you are greeted, and help inspire those who are uninspired but open to learn.

We need what you bring to the world. Bring it, please.

Releasing a Season

Sometimes, the old way of doing things just doesn’t work anymore. When it has been a worthy way — a system that you have loved that has served you well in the past – it is hard to accept this reality.

Before surrendering it, we try to figure out why it doesn’t work. We inspect it to diagnose it. Like a car that is no longer running smoothly, we assess if it can be fixed – and if it should be, or if we must say goodbye and start new.

We consider questions like, “What part of it is broken? What can I fix? What can I do? What part of it isn’t me but someone else?” Ultimately, does the power to fix this lie in you, with someone else, or have the circumstances changed completely?

At the end of the day, after lots of thinking, brainstorming, strategizing, and hopefully praying, you may conclude with an inconvenient but truthful answer — this system, process, relationship, position, or institution no longer works for you — not in this new season, regardless of how convenient it would be for you and for those in your life to have it work.

And in these moments – after exhausting ideas and options, after telling yourself stories – you finally come to the bottom of it. The conclusion has been drawn. At this point, you just have to say, “This is what it is. In this season, it no longer works for me.” And, as hard as that is to accept, there is something freeing in that, because that’s honesty — with yourself and with those around you.

I have been in this situation a number of key times before. And this phase – acceptance – is the hardest. It is hard not to run from it. It is hard to sit still, accept it, and breathe through it. But we must.

In that moment, where all results are in and we have come to this conclusion, we often begin to experience the painful feelings that come with loss. After all, there is grief that comes with the closing of a season; and we need to experience it to move towards closure in order to get to healing. And we can’t help but ask, “Now what?”

Well, you pray. Then you pray some more. Ask the Lord to comfort and direct you, and He will. Because, when you have a relationship with Jesus, not only can you get through this change – this loss, but you can do this well. You can walk away stronger, because of Christ in you, with greater hope for the future than you experienced before.

And when that flicker of light begins to ignite in you, called hope, you then might begin to ask Him, “Where to? What next? Essentially, “God, Help. Show me the way.”

That hope ignited through Christ can begin to burn brighter and brighter, when you invite the Holy Spirit in, and a new passion – a fire – can ignite in you greater than before. And, when it does, your questions may change to, “Why did I hold on for so long?”

What I have come to learn in my life is that, sometimes, we will hold on to an old way of doing things for far too long past the point of healthy, until we feel broken, drained, and dried, simply because it’s more convenient for others to have us live that way. When we do this, we sell ourselves out. We cut ourselves short, because we even tell ourselves lies to stay there. Yet, when we do these things for other people, in a very large way, that impacts our very souls, especially when the Lord is beckoning us to follow Him into a new season.

In this season of my life, I’m realizing that there are some things I have done out of obligation, and I’ve stuck with it… and stuck with it, and I’ve stuck with it. I’ve tried to fix it, bend it, flex it, looking at it from every angle. Yet, it’s time to release some processes, systems, and situations to see greater fruit ahead. Even more, though, I feel like I am supposed to share this message for someone(s) who needs this encouragement.

Is the Lord calling you to get really honest about something? To hand something over? To walk away? In my life, I have learned that not everything works for perpetuity. And it not only hurts you to continue down this path, but it hurts those in your life who, watching your soul ache, may receive a different version of you than you or they deserve.

At the end of the day, remember this: Your life is yours, gifted by God to steward well. And, many times, the Lord will guide you down a path that others do not understand, but that’s okay. They don’t have to. They really don’t. Maybe one day they will see and understand, and maybe one day they won’t. But you can’t keep wasting borrowed time stuck in a broken process or pattern.

It is pertinent we seek God and chase after His will for our lives in this next season – which may look different from last season – to fulfill His purposes and plans for your life. For it is there that you will experience spiritual, mental and emotional freedom. And we each deserve to be free, because Jesus paid a hefty price for us to be free and experience peace.

Does Your Soul Hurt?

Is something occupying your emotions but not clarified in your mind? Our soul hurts – it feels uneasy or weary – when our mind and our spirit is out of alignment.

For example, if we are filled with the Spirit, but our minds are filled with fleshly thoughts, we will be out of step with the Spirit, agitated and unwell. It is like a bruising that takes place as we ricochet back and forth.

The enemy is always warring for us. He wants our thoughts and our spirits to be in opposition in an attempt to damage our souls and occupy the area that is marked for God.

This is why we must surrender every area of our lives to Christ – making each to submit to Him so there is no room – no gray area – for the enemy to occupy. This is what it means to make Jesus the Lord of our lives.

When we submit our thoughts to Christ, our minds are occupied with Christ – with life.

When we submit our eyes to Christ, relinquishing the things that attempt to steal our purity, and we instead submit our gaze to Him, He creates in us a clean heart.

When we submit our will – our desires – to Christ, He stabilizes an otherwise restless spirit in us and renews a steadfast spirit within us.

When we surrender our finances to Christ, we submit authority – that we have stolen for our own – and give it back to Him. (Greed cannot reside where humility lives.)

When we surrender our health to Christ, He shows us the path to abundance.

When we submit our relationships to Christ, He heals the hurt and pain, and He shows us the path to restoration.

When we surrender our past to Christ, He removes our regret, even hurtful memories, and He gives us the ability to focus our attention, our energy, and our very hearts on the future where hope resides because of Him.

If your mind and your spirit feel out of alignment, ask Jesus to show you what part of your life – your thoughts, habits, or actions – are creating a chasm and causing heartache for you.

Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal it. And ask the Lord for the strength to change. Then take personal responsibility to partner with Him in this change. He is our helper to cause change and bring about healing when we invite Him in to do so. Yet, in addition to His power at work within us, we must make a daily choice to partner with Him, disciplining our free will to get into and continue operating in alignment with His greater will and power in order to find rest for our souls.

Healing starts with surrender.

Beyond the Brand: Faithfulness over Fame

So many things are vying for our attention, serving as a distraction from the main thing — the greatest commandment— to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind,” and to “Love your neighbor as yourself”(Jesus; Matthew 22:37-39).

Last night I had the opportunity to talk about the importance of faithfulness over fame with my friend, Tricia Bartig, on her and Jayne Patton’s show, Unshakeable Hope with Tricia & Jayne.

Of course the time flew by, but as the evening marched on, I couldn’t help but continue to think on this topic. And, as I woke up this morning, this image came to mind:

Like a Barbie isn’t human, fame isn’t natural. It’s plastic. It’s processed — made by man. A Barbie doesn’t have a real heart. It doesn’t have a real soul. It’s not really a human. It’s counterfeit.

Somewhere along the way, we have allowed ourselves to envy dolls with fake mansions and plastic cars, with fake boyfriends and phony friends. We manufacturer our own lives with brands and images, fashioned by humans in exchange for real life formed by a real eternal God.

We humans are not self-made. As much as we would like to be so and say so at moments, we were actually made at conception — not at our personal favorite moment of success. We are in a dangerous position, walking a ledge, when we have created our own reality.

If you trade yourself in for a counterfeit version of yourself, don’t be surprised if you feel like you have lost your very soul in the process. In fact, it’s a very real possibility.

When all the spending, nipping & tucking, and image-projecting is done, we are still human, sitting alone at some juncture, pondering life and eternity, because what we have become as a society is not natural, and our very souls know it. This is not a game. It’s real life. Until we look at the motives of our hearts, we will not be able to change.

Where is this all coming from? What are we doing it all for? What is the motivation? It all starts with the heart. So, what is going on in our hearts? Why do we, as humans, seek this type of attention?

I have a few thoughts on why…

• For validation, to quill insecurities and to feed our egos

• From fomo (fear of missing out) – to receive the invites that make us feel like someone

• For influence, power or leverage — to call the shots in our lives and others, to feel elevated

Yet, too often, instead of looking at the motives of our hearts, we tilt our reasoning — we put a spin on it — to rationalize why our personal fame helps others.

My true question is: What good does one’s fame do for others? How can you, becoming an idol, guard your soul and help the souls of others? I argue that it cannot.

And, here’s why: We are called to make JESUS known, not ourselves known. You becoming an idol is inviting people into idolatry. But the very first commandment in the 10 Commandments says, “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. You shall have no other gods before me” (Exodus 20:2-3).

As followers of CHRIST, WE should not be the object of other affections, of others worship. It is unholy to put ourselves on a pedestal. The higher we climb in our own will and own strength, the further and harder we will fall. I speak as someone who has been disciplined by my loving Heavenly Father because of my own sinful pride. He cares too much about us to let us walk the ledge. That is why it is so important that we slow down and truly listen for His voice.

Our Heavenly Father loves us — truly loves us — and cares so deeply about our souls. He wants us spiritually well for our eternity. He also wants us to live abundantly here on earth, which includes showing us the way to have healthy relationships. And that starts with being the person He created us to be with our identity rooted in Him, our true source of love.

When we become “famous” for a self-made construct, we are never truly known by others. In fact, we become leveraged for what we can do for others — used, pressured by demands, tracked for favors. Success according to the world actually puts a constant spot light on you that is unhealthy. It is like becoming a consumable product. People want and expect things from us that we cannot give and do not owe them with no good reason.

You may know Andre3000 from the band Outkast. He was once dubbed as one of the 100 most famous and influential people in the world. In an interview, when asked about his notoriety, he said, “Being famous sucks, because it feels unnatural, dehumanizing, and detrimental to mental health, altering how one moves and thinks.” From the outside looking in, millions wished they could have his life, but here he shares about feeling trapped by it.

Ultimately, we are not to be idolized. We are not God. We are incapable of meeting the needs of others. GOD IS THE SOURCE OF ALL FULFILLMENT– not me, not you, not them.

And the Lord knows this. He knows this is not His design. He knows the weight of the pressure that comes with this sin that so easily entraps us, and He wants us to be FREE. He wants us to introduce others to HIM as the source of fulfillment.

We are not God! We need to step back. He also wants each of us to be free, living from a place of Godly peace and love that shows us how to freely and joyfully give, not confined by pressures of this world.

This is why it is imperative that we repent for our selfishness, vanity, and pride (if we have found ourselves in this situation), and that we move out of the childish way of thinking of “What do I want?” to “What does GOD want for my life… and for theirs?” Make HIM known, not make ME known.

We as believers are called to SUBMIT and DELIGHT:

“Submit yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you when the time is come” (1 Peter 5:6).

And, “Delight yourself in the Lord, And He will give you the desires and petitions of your heart” (Psalms 37:4).

When we submit to Him and delight in Him, He begins to heal our hearts, change our hearts, and purify our desires to be in alignment with His will. And, when He has done that healing work — disciplining those He loves (us) — and we humble ourselves, we can become worthy vessels of Him in this world who can leave a lasting, healthy, God-glorifying impact on this earth.

Finding Your Way Back to You

Life is a gift. Your life is a gift. It’s a gift to you from God, and it’s a gift from God to others. He created you and wired you with unique gifts and a distinct personality. He has put you in certain situations to help you develop characteristics, likes, and culture for you to enjoy and to connect you with other people who need Jesus in those cultures.

He also just plain delights in you. God delights in you. He just enjoys you for who you are — like I simply enjoy my kids when they tell me something funny or unintentionally make a facial expression I find to be so cute. They are just being. They’re just being cute. God just delights in you because you’re His kid.

God delighted in the idea of you when He planned you. You have always been planned. Your first day and your last day on this earth were planned. The moment you were conceived in your mother’s womb was your first day, and He’s been doing amazing feats since then.

You are unique, and you are wonderful the way you are. Yes, the world has impacted you and tried to take away the beauty of who you are, but God has even created a way to get you back to who you were made to be — someone who is spotless and without shame because of what Jesus did — to get you back to who you are and who He created you to be.

And so, be you. Be that person — the way God created you to be.

You walk through days, cultures, situations and pressures that do not honor who you are or how you are and in those moments. Without even our knowing, we sometimes adapt too far to fit into that culture, that situation, that group, and we find ourselves surprised one day that we do not feel like our true selves. We do not feel like ourselves. We feel lost, muddy, and confused. But we don’t have to stay there. We can go back to who we really are.

It takes work. It takes focus. It takes “yes” to the right thing and “no” to the wrong things. It takes courage to be who God created you to be, especially when it goes against the grain of the culture you’re in. But you don’t want to just adapt, to become what everybody else wants you to become.

You don’t want to be a chameleon that fits into every situation. You won’t feel okay, because you aren’t being truthful. You aren’t being truthful in who you really are, and you are not standing up for who you really are. It’s important to do that. There are ways to do that, to be gracious and to say, “I think I’m going to pass on that opportunity,” knowing you want to bypass on that pressure. You can say, “I’m busy today,” or, “That doesn’t really fit into my 5-year plan.”

It is also OK to realize that you’ve gotten into the wrong situation, and it’s time to change. It’s time to find your way back to who you are and how God made you, because after all, we won’t feel peace, we won’t feel fulfilled, until we are living in the fullness of who God wired us and created us to be.

So, do the work. Do the work it takes to be you, to allow yourself to be you. Say the “yes”es and say the “no”s. Make the moves that you need to make to fully live in the calling that God has given you. It’s worth the work.

What is an example? An example might be that you’re trying to fit into a certain role or a certain group. You’re trying to talk the way they talk. You’re trying to look the way they look, behave the way they behave, but you feel like you have sold yourself out. And that’s not okay.

You spend more time with you than anyone else, and it’s important to be who you are, to enjoy who you are, to enjoy who God made you to be, and not to change yourself to be someone that you are not to be accepted by people that you weren’t called to walk with.

So I just wanted to encourage you (and myself) today to fully be who God created you to be. Make the changes it takes to do that. Then, you can be fully known by other people and feel fully loved when they love you.

You’ll laugh more. You’ll feel more fulfilled in the work that you’re doing. You’ll enjoy yourself more in your “yes”es and feel less guilty in your “no”s as you move ahead. And, like I said, life is a gift, and you will enjoy your life so much more, which will show as you experience joy and shine brightly.