“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God” (Matthew 5:9).
Everyone handles catastrophe differently. Some fight. Some run. Some retreat inwardly. Others erupt outwardly.
No one wants a catastrophe. Most people want to just act like themselves. But our emotions, our adrenaline, our hormones and chemicals are altered in times of disaster. You almost surely will experience odd interactions — maybe a few shorter texts than usual, a blunt email or two, all caps or exclamation points.
I used to take these personally, thinking they were happening to me. But, after experiencing numerous good people under stress or in crisis, I learned I just happened to be the one there, hearing or reading what was coming out, what had finally erupted in the moment, or even the pain of radio-silence as they withdrew.
In these times of crisis, in calamity, we work to have patience with each other, to treat each other with love and friendship. But, we – the ones on the receiving side of strange interactions with good people – we too have the option to extend grace and compassion. We can refuse to take it personally, seeing they are struggling, recognizing we just happen to be there when their “moment” happened, or that we are safe enough to be trusted with their pain.
We have the opportunity to be peacemakers.
Over time, I have had to learn where others end and I begin, to not own their feeling or accept the blame – resulting in defense, or take it to heart. I have learned that I must relinquish some of my own insecurity and sensitivity to be a peacemaker, but it is so worth it!
I have also learned that, when I fail to relinquish my own insecurity, I can respond in such a way that extends the drama past the moment of crisis into real life, and that is so sad and not worth it.
I am not suggesting we get close to, or tolerate bad behavior, from “iffy” people. The Bible tells us, “do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered” (Proverbs 22: 24). Instead, remembering, “a soft answer turns away wrath, but a hard word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1).
Everyone is super stressed. Let’s be the soft answer, the peacemaker. Jesus calls us blessed when we do, and I would rather be blessed than be “right.”
Sarah Guldalian 